• donboice

I would like to connect

What would you do if you saw this happening in your relationship?

“I would really like to connect with you,” she said.


“Yes, I would like to connect with you, too. Any suggestions?” he asked


Her response was interpreted this way -Let’s not meet very often. They had met regularly and she stopped coming over and inviting him over as much.


He also heard, “Let’s not email because it confuses things too fast and let’s not text, unless it is basics.”


Then he heard this message, all in the same paragraph, when we’re in person let’s not have conversation because we miscommunicate so often. I think you talk too much and I get triggered when you talk.


That’s when it got even harder for him to take and after that, he heard her communicate this message- If we do have conversation let’s stay really shallow, because I don’t do deep well.


Same conversation, two paragraphs later, he heard something that still stings deeply, when asked about it -Don’t be silly. Don’t be funny, but I love to laugh and I have a great sense of humor. Don’t be playful, because my ex was playful and I could not take him seriously, because he didn’t mean anything he said.


He heard, even though she didn’t say it- don’t be happy and we will get along. Immediately after that, she complained that he was too serious.


He told her that is what he heard and wondered if that is what she meant to convey. *Crickets*


“But I’d really like to connect with you too,” she said, ending the conversation.

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